My sister Abby sent me a package last week and taped to the outside was a poem. Hopefully you can read it in the photo above. I read it and was just delighted by it, so much so that I cut it out and saved it. She texted me later, “Did you get the package I sent yet, with the highly unrealistic poem taped to the outside?” I told her that I did and that I loved it. Yes, it is highly unrealistic. But there is some part of me that likes to believe that this could be a reality for some. A tidy existence where everything is under control. It’s really a dangerous way to think, because if it’s possible for someone else, then it must be possible for me as well, if I could just _______________ (fill in the blank.) This kind of thinking tends to lead to discouragement for me, because I’m never able to fill in the blank. I may be accomplishing plenty of needful things, but in the meantime the weeds are still growing and my little boys may very well be making a gigantic mud mess in the front yard unbeknownst to me. (If this happens to you, take photos. You’ll want them someday when the discouragement over your laundry mess is long past.)
And really, life is uncontrollable, unpredictable, and messy. Even the lives of those who seem so tidy on the outside. Rest assured, no one who knows me is confused on that point. My life is messy inside and out, and quite obviously so! But we’re managing pretty well here. I’m having my worst ever flare up of thyroid related symptoms, but think I know where I went wrong and am hoping to feel better soon. I’m getting through school with the kids each day and that is my number one goal. Silas is still resisting with all his might, but Job is quite the opposite, begging for math and reading lessons and making my mornings a little less frustrating. One routine that we have settled into nicely is starting out with handwriting while I read from the Bible and Catechism. We always do that first, and it helps the boys settle down. My girls tend to listen and write as well before heading off to do their own math lessons.
Week before last was dominated by character analysis papers that Gabe and Keats had to write on Lord of the Flies. I hadn’t read it in probably 30 years, and in order to help, reread about half of it and spent hours discussing it. I kept imagining Silas and Job as part of the story (with horror). And when I discovered the new mud pit in the front yard and the two of them throwing giant globs of mud at each other, my thoughts immediately turned to Lord of the Flies and the early days on the island before things went downhill. Just a bunch of little boys with no grownups to interfere in their fun. (If you haven’t read it, be warned that it is rather disturbing.) The last few weeks for us have been awfully full of little boy drama. Silas had a tree house building accident that resulted in nine stitches, and that has been followed by burns, scrapes, and puncture wounds, leading me to double check tetanus shot records and sigh loudly again and again. These boys! Gabe and I exchange glances, shake our heads and say, “Lord of the Flies,” now at each new catastrophe. I’m happy to be sharing books with Gabe and Keats this year, grateful really. This week we are discussing Melville’s Benito Cereno, which I ended up liking! It’s super complex and I’m glad I read it. Next up for my boys will be Kafka’s The Metamorphosis. Now that’s a weird story.
p.s. I finally finished preparing all of my goldenrod yarn and plan to update my shop on Thursday at 11 am ET. There will be goat’s milk soap too!
p.p.s. Here’s a post of Larkspur and her friend Josie from five years ago. They have grown up so much! They still love many of the same things though: plants, dressing up in playsilks, and putting on fancy makeup.
p.p.p.s. See if you can spot the hummingbird in the fourth photo from the top. They get trapped in our garage sometimes and we have to catch them in nets and release them outside. It’s neat to get to see them up close but also so sad to see them exhaust themselves trying to escape.
Shelly Cunningham says
I reread Lord of the Flies recently (I hadn’t read it since tenth grade) and found it SO MUCH MORE disturbing now that I am the mother of three little boys! Hah!
Lana says
I hope you are soon on the mend. I loved the poem, too. Even after all the littles have flown your nest there are messes and when you find a sticky hand print left by a visiting grandchild you may do like me and carefully clean around it for weeks so that the little hand stays right there. Our neighbors have 4 boys and we quite enjoy all the stuff going on over there because we don’t have to be the parent! (Smile)
Emily M B says
The mother in the poem barely mentions her children except to note that they’re in school or bed. As if enjoyment is chiefly experienced when they’re not around. Those children will not have very fond memories of home if all they remember is that it was shiny! Your children will have lots of wonderful memories!
Conni says
What timing on your post! I just commented to my husband (of 47 years) that as we came home this afternoon and I went to different rooms, putting things away, I was praising God for allowing me to live to this ‘place of life’….our home is orderly, clean, quiet, PEACE-FULL. It was not at all that way when we were raising our five sons and a daughter, homeschooling, and living all that you experience each day. I was often wistful, then, of a time when order might reign (but skeptical, in the thick of it!). But, ALAS, it has come to pass!! And, because the ‘messy’ years were so full, these days are all the more appreciated! So, Dear Younger Mother, remember there are seasons to Life….continue to do what you do so well in your home where love is evident. AND the future will include a bathroom you can unapologetically allow guests to use! LOL. conni
Conni says
What timing on your post! I just commented to my husband (of 47 years) that as we came home this afternoon and I went to different rooms, putting things away, I was praising God for allowing me to live to this ‘place of life’….our home is orderly, clean, quiet, PEACE-FULL. It was not at all that way when we were raising our five sons and a daughter, homeschooling, and living all that you experience each day. I was often wistful, then, of a time when order would reign (but skeptical, in the thick of it!). But, ALAS, it has come to pass!! And because the ‘messy’ years were so full, these days are all the more special! So, Dear Younger Mother, remember there are seasons to Life….continue to do what you do so well in your home where love is evident. AND the future will include a bathroom you can unapologetically allow guests to use! LOL. conni
Marilyn says
Ginny, sorry that you are not feeling well. Hope Silas decides to cooperate with his school work and lessons. Glad that Silas is on the mend. God Bless.
Marilyn
karen says
Our son would have an emergency room run every year, we got to the point of sighing instead of panicking. We joke about it now but gosh he kept us busy! I hope you feel better soon and now I want a tiny house 🙂
Joan says
Wishing you well with Silas wanting to do school work. Job seems so anxious to learn. Good for him. The flowers are gorgeous. Hope you feel better soon.
Joan
Marion says
Ginny it is a beautiful poem . You always try to make a worthy system of priorities but something unexpected comes along. Your boys really know how to make a mess. Boys will be boys.
Marion
Marion says
Ginny feel better. Will keep you in my prayers.
Marion
Mary says
I LOVE the poem from your sister! It exists to remind me that I mustn’t see truth or happiness in that state of mind. For me, thinking like that leads to depression. But I do smile at the shiny, impossible image! You must read Stephanie Pearl-McPhee’s blog on Sept. 5. (yarnharlot.ca)She writes so eloquently of putting people first, despite the “dust bisons” and talks about CHAOS in the house. A must read for busy, creative people! Bless you, Ginny, for your wonderful blog. Do take care of yourself! XO
Caroline says
Sorry to hear about all the accidents! I bet those young boys keep you on your toes.
I re read lord of the flies last year as I also hadn’t read it since school and was interested to see how much I had remembered correctly and to see what I thought about it 30 years later. It’s a very disturbing book!
Last year I chose balance as my word of the year as I wanted the opportunity to learn how to keep a good balance between work and home life and hobby life and being a wife, and the biggest learn was that it doesn’t exist.
I let go of the idea of finding balance very early on and all of a sudden had room and space for everything I wanted to do. Please bear in mind that I have no kids so my time is really my own, and still I felt like I couldn’t control anything. I think we all strive to have it all under control. Be kind to yourself x
Nancy M says
Sweet poem that your sister sent. That’s a fun idea to send on packages. ? poor little hummingbird. Glad you can help them out. Sorry for your thyroid symptoms, glad you think you figured out the flare up so you can address it. Sometimes that part is daunting just to figure it out.
You may enjoy a poem my mother taught us when I was little that she had memorized as a young girl. It is called September by Helen Hunt Jackson. Always a favorite!! ???
Carla Fawcett says
I love reading about your family. Big families reap such great rewards in the years ahead. We have six grown children and seven grand babies so far : )
Are the boys twins? Love your photos
Jane says
I haven’t read Lord of the Flies since school but I have frequently referred to it in raising my three boys! Still no pig heads on sticks here though.
Jeannie I says
You are my favorite most honest and humorous writer/real person on the internet. Always delighted to see a post. Maybe something you like: https://womenyoushouldknow.net/appalled-graphic-designer-shows-girls-life-magazine-what-their-cover-should-look-like/?fbclid=IwAR3-jXm-GB5PFcuCshBmTgTLWPAdrhAATJERWNF1KTa7K13p_XSpBXdgvBc
Maggie says
Amazing photos!
Lady Locust says
I love the picture of the turning leaves – and of the boys. Sorry it was in the front yard and that they didn’t get down to skivvies before plunging into the mud, but what great pictures and great memories.
PS – I’m pretty certain the poem is totally fictional! (A lovely thought though)
Kate says
When I read that poem, I thought to myself, I can’t remember the last time anything was “shiny” around this house. Then I chuckled to myself. But, you’re right, there are people who do live in a “shiny little house” and it makes us that don’t sometimes feel as if we ought to live as they do. But, I remember a long time ago as a new mother (sans indoor pets) that I attempted to keep everything shiny and clean and in order. I tried with all my might and energy to maintain order and control (much easier with only 1 child). But, I found that I was angry and prickly when that order was disrupted shall we say. Then child number 2 came along and then child number 3… and then a 156-pound Newfoundland really tipped the whole “shiny house” attempt upside down. I’ve been happier for the slobbery, muddy, chaotic mess ever since. I’m so happy for my children’s sake that my attitude didn’t stay stuck on that idea that the house has to be shiny to be good. It doesn’t. Of course we ourselves don’t have to be “shiny” to be good either. That is the message of the gospel. Christ loves us anyway, even in our mess and even more so because we’re a mess.
Andrea G says
In the past year or so I read an article about Frank Kafka’s relationship with his father. I thought it was helpful in understanding The Metamorphosis in a deeper way.
That sweet-seeming poem depicts an impossible life unless you have very quiet and boring children. You’re lucky yours are inventive and interesting = messy.
Elizabeth says
I am so sorry you are having a H. flare! that’s hard! God give you peace and courage in it! That poem and vintage paper with lovely drawing is so dear; for you you don’t send your kids off to school so obviously it can’t be your situation. But how wonderful is your situation with all the mess, life, beauty creation and love… it is so neat that you have this bond with your old boys via reading books; that’s really great and I can see that it is enriching your days. God bless you all!!!