Recently, in what might have been a misguided effort to take care of myself, I decided to give up my daily cup of coffee. I had gone a few days without drinking any because of the stomach bug my family had, and I decided that I ought to just stop all together. For the next few days, I drank black or green tea instead. After a few days of exclusive tea drinking, I decided that I would eliminate caffeine all together and only drink herbal tea. I thought it would be good to get in touch with how I really feel. You know, get in touch with my decaffeinated body. So here I am, two weeks without coffee and about one week without caffeine. I feel…tired and kind of old. Haggard would be a good word. Of course Job is also nursing an excessive number of times during the night and I need to night wean him again. (Yes, again.) But at least I know now that my cup or two of coffee a day wasn’t what was causing his night waking.
A few sleepy days ago, I impulsively made an appointment for a haircut this week, my first one in nearly a year. I boldly scheduled with a new stylist at a new salon. I have haircut anxiety so this was big. My plan was just a little trim, and then maybe I might decide to go short again next time. I lost so much hair after my last two babies, that I guess I’ve been hanging on to the little I have left, scraggly as it is. The day of my appointment, while I waited in the salon to be called back, the girl at the counter offered me “Coffee?” (Sigh.) “Tea?” “A Coke?” I replied, “I’m good, unless you have apple cider vinegar, and in that case I’d like a little diluted with purified water, but only if you have the stuff with The Mother.” Just kidding. But that is what I’ve been drinking for the past week in addition to herbal tea. I’m not sure what I am expecting to accomplish with that, so far I’m just tired.
The young, bouncy, adorable girl that cut my hair acted shocked when I told her that I’m 37 years old and have an unreasonable number of little bunnies at home. She said that she assumed I was younger than her. She’s 29. I LOVE her even though she’s a liar. She’s cutting my hair from now on. She inspired me to forget the trim and cut about six inches off my hair, and I’m glad. Jonny took pictures so I could email my mom, who has always been concerned for my hair. (And mom, you’ll be pleased to know that I bought a new product to make it bigger too.) I guess I thought you guys might want to see it as well. If not, rest assured that I only write about my hair about once a year.
But most importantly, should I just forget all this nonsense about getting in touch with the way I really feel and start drinking coffee again? Or should I be all pure and decaffeinated? I’ve proven that I can go without coffee, so it would probably be okay to just have my one cup a day. Right? RIGHT? My sister Sarah, a coffee drinker herself suggested that I stop this nonsense and drink my coffee. “You’re too tired for this!”
I am. I love my bunnies, but they exhaust me.
Naomi says
Oh my goodness, I hear you on the hair thing! My hair is in the same camp – thin and scraggly, but it’s long enough to pull into a lazy ponytail. If I cut it shorter, which I’ve had before and like, then I need to do things like iron it. It looks great on you!
Coffee – people will pull out evidence that’s it’s great for you and bad for you, depending on their own personal preference. I’ve actually never gotten into coffee, strangely enough. Used it a bit in college for some night studying/writing, but that’s it. I do, however, like a shot of coffee in a full glass of milk. I personally love rooibos with cream. Those night feedings do one in though!
Naomi says
p.s. do you have a tea strainer that fits in a cup? Makes drinking loose teas much more enjoyable.
Ginny says
I do! It’s actually in the mug in my picture, but it blends in because it has a white edge and my mug was white!
Katie says
How about a happy medium? I drink Kicking Horse “half ass” which is half decaf half regular and I find it just perfect! If I drink full caff I can get a little anxious/jittery, but this blend does the trick. You look great!
Jen Letts says
Coffee is youth in a cup? Gimme some! If it’ll take away that tired, haggard feeling? Then yes!
kirsten says
I love your new haircut and I love the photos of you interacting with your kids. You’re doing well, mama.
Kathy says
The haircut is adorable!
I tried doing the same after a bout with the stomach flu. Took me all of one week to decide tea/water/milk was not cutting the mustard and a cup of coffee didn’t define me.
If you enjoy that cup of coffee, then by all means treat yourself. You deserve it!
Jodi@prairiekuchen says
Seriously. SO FUNNY…apple cider vinegar.. 🙂
I’m still feeding my little one at night – around 4am. The first thing I think of when my head hits the pillow is how I can’t wait for that 1 cup of coffee I allow myself in the morning. Good and strong. with cream, honey and a dash of cinnamon. It’s what gets me through the night… and the next day 🙂
Give yourself a break.
And your hair is so cute.
Heidi says
I had to quit all caffeine a couple of years ago due to a heart rhythm issue. I still miss coffee. I’ve tried every herbal tea known to man and even though I love a good cup of herbal tea I still miss my coffee! The closest imitation coffee that has come close is Teechino. At least it doesn’t have caffeine. I say, enjoy your cup while you can! By the way, love love your haircut!
Renata says
Isn’t the formula: 1 cup of coffee for every two children. You DEFINITELY need your coffee!! And now I want to go to your stylist. She sounds wonderful!
I always enjoy your blog Ginny! I comment far too irregularly, but it’s always one I enjoy, so thanks!
Blessings
Renata:)
Richard says
Ginny, with all of your “bunnies” and a husband to take care of and home-schooling them to boot, you definitely deserve to have some coffee along the way. As many of the other commenters have mentioned, life is too short – go ahead and indulge in that simple pleasure. You can always chill-out with a nice cup of Chamomile tea before bedtime.
Beth says
How you really feel? I think you REALLY feel tired. Get some coffee girl!
barbara arenburg says
Love your post Ginny! And hey neighbour, I’ve nothing to do tomorrow so why don’t I pop over and we’ll have a morning coffee together? Free at 9-ish? And it looks like we’ve been thinking the same lately. I just got my hair done yesterday too…after way too long a wait, and way too many pony tails and buns to hide the mess. Love your new ‘do’
Bettie Johnson says
Ginny, I love your hair shorter….makes you look a lot younger! And DRINK COFFEE! Enjoy life……it is short!!!
Love you and Jonny!!!
Olivia says
I lurve the coffee, and I only have 2 bunnies. My nearly-2-year-old doesn’t make pretend cups of tea, she makes ‘toFEE? hot TOFFEE?’ thanks to me muttering about coffee first thing every morning. I gave it up when I was trying to get pregnant with her, and took it back up asap, pregnancy and breastfeeding not withstanding… Do what makes you feel good. As per the Yarn Harlot, there’s nothing harmful about coffee!
Brigitte says
I read a lot of the comments. No one can tell you. You just have to listen to your body. I love the smell and taste of coffee and for a short while it makes me feel wonderful, but later the “rats come out of the cellar” which is my reference to G.K. Chesterton’s depiction of our worse natures. Only you can tell the trade offs for yourself.
Ann @ Flattened Affects says
Life’s too short; drink that coffee baby!
Dee Bryant says
I gave up caffeine about 4 years ago, when my littlest (fourth) was a baby with horrible reflux. I was on two strong ones a day and couldn’t do anything in the morning without a coffee first. It nearly killed me to give it up, but I did. For about 3 years I’d have maybe 1 decaf a week at a nice cafe with friends, a treat. I could feel the effects of the ‘decaf’ all day long! When you’ve given it up it only takes a little bit to get a buzz. Those day’s I felt like I could achieve 100 times more than any other day! Now I have a good relationship with caffeine. If I’m feeling especially tired I’ll have a cup of green tea and I’ll still have a weak or decaf when I’m out with friends a couple of times a week, but I don’t feel like I’m a slave to it and there are days when I don’t even think about having a tea or coffee, but I don’t feel like I’m depriving myself either. Good luck. X
Melanie says
oh dear, I say go for the coffee! I have tried to give it up as well, and can only seem to do so while in the first half of pregnancy.
I have hair similar to yours (so it looks anyhow), same color too. I also lost a lot of it in my last two pregancies, although it might have to do with age? I’m 37. I’m pregnant with my fifth, and hope to not lose any more! I am a long hair lady at heart! Your hair looks lovely, it is what I’d choose too.
Barbara Jane says
Oh, my dear, why make rules for yourself? Want coffee? Have it! Don’t want coffee? Have something else. If we make rules – and then break them – we are setting ourselves up for feeling like failures. Life should be full of joyful choices, not prohibitions. What makes you feel good? What does NOT make you feel good? Let that be your guide. One of my greatest pleasures is when my Handsome Husband gets up before me in the morning (that doesn’t often happen) and makes coffee, and then brings me a cup in bed. Oh, what heaven, that simple gift of good hot coffee in bed! But it could just as easily be tea or OJ. It is the unexpected gift of it that I enjoy.
Eschew “shoulds” and embrace simple pleasures, is my advice.
Before you know it, your bunnies will be living busy lives a thousand miles away and you will be wondering why the house is so quiet.
Peace be with you.
Helen Pugh says
I took two attempts to give up caffeine – I had so much more energy when I finally completed the task! I can’t imagine going back to it now, it would finish me off, just steal the remaining energy I have left. There will always be people who try to get you to change back – I have no idea why! – I carry redbush teabags in my handbag (I think that would be purse in American English) for those types of hairdresser moments you mention! I encourage you to stay off the caffeine – it sounds like you’ve already done the hard bit!
Laura says
I say go for the coffee, and your hair looks wonderful!! Moms need all the perks they can get. Coffee, hair appointments, anything to help them feel great. If Mom feels good everyone does.
Wendi says
I say keep the coffee, but keep it to before-lunch hours. That’s the compromise I have finally come to for myself. Also, little known fact…coffee is one of the highest sources of potassium. Look it up. ( and bananas are not,-we are so misinformed!) so in our house, it’s health food;)
Kathryn says
I listened recently to a podcast on The Paleo View, about coffee and your thyroid. I know I Must have an under active thyroid, always struggling in afternoon especially…but my husband makes a pot every morning on his way out the door and it tempts me, sometimes successfully. I do love the hazelnut teccino I found at Wegmans. I don’t miss coffee when I have that. Haircut looks great!!!
Kerri Warmus says
I love reading your blog, so happy to have the hair updates…so cute! I had to give up coffee due to high blood pressure and it was really hard as I loved it so. I have found the one thing that perks me up the most is making fresh lemon ginger tea with honey. It’s not the same as coffee but it seems to help me feel energized way more than black or green tea. I know you are probably overloaded with advice, but I think you would feel better to keep going without the coffee if you could also have everyone leave for 3 hours each weekend (long nap) and for 30 minutes each day (short nap or “siesta”) and let you sleep. I had to do that because I was just exhausted and it had to happen regularly for me to get better. Recovering from sleep deprivation takes longer than is convenient. I am so much nicer and so much more centered and happy and my husband could really see that it was worth it for him to make the sacrifice and make my naps a priority for the whole family. If you can’t get regular naps, then go back on the coffee until you can!
Renee Anne says
As a former caffeine addict (yes, caffeine can be – and is! – considered an addictive substance), keep going without the caffeine. Eventually, you will be back to “normal” or some semblance of that. It took me probably a good year before I was “normal” again (I was never “normal” in the first place but I was entirely myself rather than a caffeinated spaz). I suffered migraines for months after quitting cold turkey. It was bad. And I was in high school when it happened. I quit in 1996 and didn’t start drinking it again until probably 2005ish…and I don’t drink anywhere near what I used to drink. I maybe have one or two caffeinated beverages a week (usually Starbucks but maybe a Mt. Dew…)…compared with the 12-15 cans of soda I was drinking per day. No joke. How I didn’t gain a ton of weight is beyond me…I gained it when I went off the stuff. ::sigh::
Also, photos of hair please 🙂
Shelly Cunningham says
I loved this post! Love the honesty about getting off coffee and wanting to drink it again. I just got back on it, and I am so happy for it during homeschooling. Something about holding that warm, delicious cup in my hands makes me a better (more patient, sweeter) mama & teacher!
And also, I love your haircut. It looks so healthy & smooth.
Jenny says
I just did the same thing at a new salon. Who new the solution for thinning scraggly mama hair was a lob? Yours looks great. And please, for the love, you deserve a cup of good coffee in the morning …those babies make you earn it!
Judy says
A cup of coffee first thing in the morning just makes a day a whole lot better…
Your haircut is lovely.
Laura says
I can’t have caffeinated coffee anymore because babies. Specifically the last one. But I love the taste of coffee. I like tea, but I love coffee. And so I decided to be the “old” person I am and buy decaf coffee for myself. Turns out the flavor of coffee gets me going in the morning more than the caffeine.
Megan Wahl says
I recently had to seriously decrease my coffee intake too and I was feeling so down and out. It is difficult to give routines up- plus a seriously early rising child and this cold dreary weather. Maybe I should give tea a try and see if that helps fill the coffee void in the morning!
tamara says
Oh goodness what a wonderful post! I myself do not drink coffee as it makes me anxious and that cannot be good. I love my Eary Grey’s however. But, I limit myself to two cups per day (today it’s three) because then I get swirly-headed. Caffeine and I do not get along, it does not do anything to make me feel more awake – except at 3am when I wake up after drinking a cup after 4pm the night before. I just love the taste.
As far as the Mother goes, I do make my own, with a bit of ginger juice. But go on bouts where I don’t drink it, like where I don’t make my green smoothies. I am like a 12 year old rebelling from what is good for me.
xx
Love the hair. 🙂
Marta says
I love coffee and because really good decoffeiniert really expensive is, I drink normal. But one or two cups a day are ok, aren’t they. I I do not drink every day, sometimes I just do not think about it or have no time. But a nice of of coffee is just nice!
The alternative is also Matcha – I drink it also often. Delicious!
Best regards.
Marta
Tyna Begley says
Love the new do!!!!!! Do you drink for the coffee or for the caffiene? I don’t care either way about caffeine, but I love coffee. So I drink decaf. whenever I want. Without guilt.
Cathy says
I’ve heard lots of studies say a little coffee is GOOD FOR YOU!
Sarah says
Enjoy the coffee!!☕️ cute cut!
katie says
drink the coffe, honey. coffee is a gift to mamas from Jesus.
Lilah says
Your haircut is lovely — youthful and vibrant, even in the winter! And I’m in the pro-coffee camp, if you’re keeping track. I myself am a black or green tea drinker (coffee tends to set my stomach on edge and I drink it only on special occasions when I know I’m going to have lots of food, too)… but if I try to go a morning without my daily cup of tea, I just feel off and even sad. Perhaps it’d be better to rid myself of the need for the caffeine, but like your sister says — you’re too tired and you’ve got too many kids for that kind of nonsense. You can be caffeine-free when you’re an empty-nester!
Susannah says
LOVE your hair, it really suits you! xx
Victoria says
I quit coffee a year ago and have never regreted it 🙂 give yourself more time (a month maybe?) totally caffeine free and then decide. I like not needing anything in the mornings to get myself going, it was hard the first months but I don’t even miss it now. You know they have coffee substitutes like Dandy blend for example made of dandylion root? It tastes similar to coffee and looks the same 🙂 good luck!
Jeanette says
Love the haircut! I am one of those people who firmly believe a cup of coffee a day is healthy. My energy levels are always highest when I am well hydrated and get my daily dose f sunshine. Enjoy your beautiful family and thanks for this wonderful blog 🙂
Caitlin says
I alternate between coffee and black tea. Sometimes when coffee is too much for me but I still need some warmth and caffeine the tea is nice 🙂 I say keep a cup of something in your day. You have so much in your days(and nights!) xoxo
Emily says
Oh my, I firmly believe that mamas survive on the Grace Of God and lots of coffee! I have my cup every morning!
Dana says
I’m with you! I’m a quarter Dutch – we take our coffee intravenously thank-you very much!
Laura says
Apple cider vinegar is a known blood thinner. It might be affecting your energy levels. That, and you’ll be cold all the time, too.
Sonia says
Thank you, as ever, for your honesty. I gave up my daily cup last winter, and found that I could do without.nthat said, I missed coffee. I like coffee. So now it’s a non-daily treat, and I make sure I have tea or water first, just to see if I still want coffee later. I’m on my second cup this morning… ; )
Emily T. says
Your haircut is EXTREMELY attractive, Ginny!
And I would bring on the coffee myself. 🙂
Joseph says
Although I’ve never been a coffee drinker, I had a diet coke addiction for sure. I recently gave that up and switched, like you, to black and green teas. I’ve always loved tea so it wasn’t much of a sacrifice. For almost a month now, I’ve had nothing but water and green tea…
… and HAGGARD is exactly the right word.
You can try being extra hydrated — that makes a big difference. Or you can drink more green tea (5-6 cups) which can also perk you up.
My best recovery has been to take more naps — but that seems laughable for you with all the little ones.
Those are all options that worked for me — especially in combination. But if they’re not available to you, I say one cup of coffee per day won’t kill you 🙂
Dana says
Life is short, do what makes you the best you can be and if coffee is part of that, then drink a cup or two a day. 🙂
Miss B says
I completely agree with Dana. If you were drinking something we knew to be dangerous or shooting heroin, then I would be the first to tell you to stop or get help. However, a moderate amount of black coffee (not coffee loaded down with sugar or artificial sweeteners) seems to be harmless, and perhaps even beneficial (antioxidants, cancer prevention, blood sugar moderation might *possibly be some advantages depending on which study you believe), to most people. If you do not have any moral objections or health issues that prevent you from enjoying coffee, drink up sister!
Dana says
This Dana agrees 100%!
And your haircut is super cute!
kim schildbach says
I’m with sis’, drink your coffee and enjoy it. My green tea is TOTEM to my afternoons going smoothly but that is because I can’t drink coffee.
Someday I’ll be all pure and full of rainbows and unicorns but for these years I need caffeine. And time alone. And a good haircut. And elastic waist pants. 🙂
Jen says
You look beautiful! Enjoy your coffee–everything in moderation 🙂
sue mcmillen says
Science is now saying that coffe is actually good for and has antioxodents. Drink up!
Beth says
I’m a firm believer that mommy’s need coffee. We earn it. We deserve it! It’s a little happy grown up thing while everything we do for our kids, share with our kids…all day long. But coffee….that’s just for mommy. 🙂
Your hair looks beautiful!
Sheila says
Your hair is adorable! Now go have a cup of coffee! A warm cup of coffee make a happy start to everyday, it’s delicious and good for you. 🙂