Today has not felt like the best day so far. Nothing particularly bad has happened, it just seems like we’re all a little off. Or maybe it’s just me? We’ve made it through our routines, but just barely. It seems like my older kids have been bickering a little more than usual, or maybe I’m just noticing it more. Mabel was very mischievous and fussy all morning and I’m grateful that she’s napping now. I’m tempted to sit down with my knitting and re-group, but I think I’ll work a bit while my older kids play and finish up their own work. I’m glad that we have routines so that even on days that feel a little lousy, most of the necessary work gets done. Not every day can be one of those magical ones, and it’s important to be able to keep moving forward. I wrote the words that follow yesterday, and it’s interesting how today I am already finding myself needing the reminder…
I’m beginning to believe that the new “Morning Time” routine that I started a couple of weeks ago is going to stick. It all started when my sister directed me towards a homeschooling podcast geared towards supporting this practice. It’s certainly a concept that I’m familiar with, and something I did with Seth and Keats when they were small, but as the years went by, and more babies came, I fell out of the habit. However, I had been looking for a way to bring some new structure to our homeschooling days, and realized that this was just what we needed. I took the subjects and stories that I most wanted to share with my younger kids, but was failing to get around to, and started having an all ages lesson time every morning. I didn’t aim for too early in the morning, but paid attention to our natural rhythm so I wouldn’t end up feeling like a failure if we didn’t get started when I hoped. And I knew from experience not to expect it to be seamless. Job and Mabel can be pretty disruptive and I know I just have to accept that and work around it. Years ago, I suspect I would have had a harder time with that.
I tend to make fantastic plans that I don’t actually end up putting into longterm action. I aim too high and make things too complicated. And then, I want things to be “perfect.” I have a friend who has said to me more than once, “Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.” I am quite guilty of doing just that.
Listening to the same podcast that got me into this new morning routine, I heard a piece of advice that I realized I had already been putting into practice lately, and I think it’s been very important. I believe it was Cindy Rollins who said, “Just do the thing.” Whatever it is you are stressing about, the thing you either want to do, or know you should be doing and aren’t, just do it. Don’t wait until you have the perfect plan, just go ahead and do it. If you are a homeschooler, don’t wait until you have figured out a way to keep the younger kids quietly occupied (there’s no foolproof way to do that unless they are asleep), just do whatever it is in the midst of chaos. And sometimes it won’t be chaotic. Somedays everything will be almost perfect. Of course on my recent day of that sort, a pipe burst and water started pouring out of the ceiling over our homeschooling table. I’ve definitely learned to laugh in the face of crazy things like that. There is no “perfect,” so why aim for it? And I think that this little motto can apply to far more than my homeschooling day:
Aim for good.
Angela says
I just found you a few days ago through “posie gets cozy”, and find myself reading or more looking back through your blog since. Your beautiful pictures of happy, nicely clothed children and nature and awesome colours sooth my mind and just make me happy. I know it’s not, but it looks like paradise for me – living in a 2 bedroom apartment in a big city, with no garden or balcony. Beside that I love your honesty and I’m an introvert, too. Thank you for sharing your life here!
“Just do the thing” encouraged me to get started sorting out kid’s clothes which I really hate. We only have 4 children 2-7 (another on the way), but they always change sizes at the same time (plus shoe size) and of course at a change of season. Their wardrobes burst with clothes too small and too warm, plus I got some boxes with hand-me-downs. Which is awesome but… It’s overwhelming and I so want to have a perfect plan and time (ha!) before I start, but this way it just never happens and is a real burden.
Now tomorrow I plan on just starting with something. Just do it.
Sending love from Germany!
Angela
Jonsi says
I’m new here, and we are just starting in our homeschooling journey. This particular point really struck home with me: “Whatever it is you are stressing about, the thing you either want to do, or know you should be doing and aren’t, just do it. Don’t wait until you have the perfect plan, just go ahead and do it. ” I can already see myself not doing this – I have all these detailed plans of how I imagine things should be that I think will probably get left in the dust once we get going.
My kids want to do projects or experiments and I find myself saying, “Well not yet, I have to plan for it first.” Sometimes that’s practical – I need to gather the materials (or purchase things I might not have) – other times, I want to wait for “the perfect moment.” But I don’t think the kids really care about all that – they don’t care about plans or the perfect moment – they just want to DO.
So I appreciate this post quite a bit and I’m going to work hard to keep this sentiment in mind.
-Jonsi
Ginny says
It’s a hard one to stick to, but I think it’s really important in the chaotic scheme of things! The perfect moment never arrives!
Kate says
The shawl you are working on is looking beautiful. Could you repeat what the name of the pattern is? I say repeat because I am certain that you have already mentioned it. Thanks!
Kathie Gray says
Such good advice “aim for good” and it isn’t the first time I’ve heard it recently so it must be something I need to hear! I read somewhere that when, as parents, we strive for perfection it sets our children up to do the same and therefore perhaps not be as happy as they could otherwise, they suggested that “good enough” is better all round. Thanks so much for sharing.
karen says
I’d like to believe I’m perfect but I’m imperfectly perfect. I try to accept who I am and go with it. I think we can be so hard on ourselves and we need to be more loving. I be you are one of the goodest people I know 🙂
Heather says
I’ll have to give that podcast a listen, because I’d love to have a morning routine that didnt feel frantic and rushed. I also “aim high” and have grand ideas that sometimes dont turn out, and then feel frustrated. There’s nothing wrong with ‘good’ and ‘good enough.’ We should all be so lucky to make it there on a regular basis!
Cheryl A says
Aim for Good – I love that! I too aim too high and make things out to be more complicated than they need to be and of course it has to be perfect. Then I get overwhelmed and do nothing. Sigh!!! In my quilting life someone said to me – “finished is better than perfect”. I try to apply that in all aspects of my life. I love your photos. Very sweet. Beautiful family. Stay well.
Heathermama7 says
Perfect timing! Our life has gotten a bit crazy here which leaves me unfocused and feeling overwhelmed. So instead of staying the course everything flings apart. It feels as if there is a whole lot riding on my shoulders and when things aren’t perfect I feel like why bother?? The thing is it’s never perfect because that’s life!
Don’t let perfect get in the way of good! Such wise words!
Clémence says
I like that idea and this inspiring phrase should go right on my fridge!
Lisa says
Love the photos and hope that you find the routine that works best for you.
Marion says
Hope you are able to get some self time. Your family is lovely.
Marion
Teresa says
You might want to up the elderberry if everyone is feeling off.
GretchenJoanna says
What a good word. Thank you!
annie says
Thanks for the podcast recommendation. I am setting out to homeschool little Monnie, I think…. Right now we have no schedule at all (even a daily routine), and I know God is calling me to that. But, boy – am I resistant!
Ginny says
Annie, I think you will really like it! Start with the first episode!!
Amanda C says
I’ve been working on a new morning time routine too. I don’t know why we got out of the habit, it seems to make our day go smoother, even if it’s the only thing we accomplish.
Ginny says
Yes, it does! And, I think it brings me peace of mind for sure.
Debbie says
Oh did I need to read this today! Yes! Aim for good. And good enough has to be good enough, right? Thank you.
Bethany Fagundes says
I would like to say that along with all else, be present in the moment is a huge one that I wish I would have caught on to while my children were living at home. The time flies by so quickly, although it seems as though the tasks will never be done and life will never be as it should (compared to some not real standard I had created for myself!). Now that phase of life is over and I so wish with all my heart that I had cherished the time a whole lot more, instead of wishing for a more perfect time. Things are as they should be right now, for this moment. Enjoy each one.
Sara says
Thank you for all the great links and resources!!
Becky Boyles says
Jennie you don’t have a clue who I am but I so enjoy reading your blog and following your life from my little town in Belton, SC. I can’t remember how I found your blog, but I love your family and all that you do. Actually I admire how much you accomplish and all of your skills. Having an off day is a part of life. I think God intended it that way. After I have one of those days, it can make certain days just sparkle.
I’m praying for you!!
Becky
Amy Marie says
This really resonates with me. Thank you. Aim for the good. I just try to keep moving forward, and yes, basic routines keep things going even when most things are off. Love that. I think bigger families have an unique opportunity to learn these lessons of “nothing is ever going to be perfect” so just keeping chugging along and notice the little moments inside the big chaotic whole. It really does work, if I can still myself, notice the beauty, and enjoy the ride.
Caroline says
That desire to be perfect and practiced and an expert in a thing before actually starting it is something that hounds me daily. I have so many little projects that I want to try but wanting to be expert before I even open the packaging is stopping me.
Thank you for the reminder that good is a great place to be
MJ says
Ah, yes. Many a time I have to remind myself to not let perfect be the enemy of the good. In other versions, I’ve heard “just do the thing” (do the awful task first, etc.) but its the first time I’ve heard it like that and in seems, somehow, easier when phrased like that. So, tomorrow I’m going to just do the thing and aim for good. Because I think I may be able to manage that.
Larissa says
Yes!
Thanks for this!
Jolaine says
Oh, thank you for this reminder…it doesn’t matter if you have children in the home or not or what age/stage in life we are at! Bless you for being a blessing to me!
Pam says
This so applies to my feeling about my life and my knitting. I go to a knitting group every Tuesday and the ladies there are incredibly talented knitters. This week one woman knit a entire raglan sweater with three colors in just one week! Really!!! I have never even knit a sweater. Well, I’m have knit sweaters for babies but not for myself. I continue to leave this group feeling “less than” because I don’t see my abilities anywhere near the rest of the knitters there. I am trying to believe that I am different and that’s OKAY ?. I don’t have to be perfect or “as good as” anyone else. I am enjoying my knitting even if it is not as complicated and intense as theirs. However, from time to time I still fight the “less than” feeling.
Karla says
“Don’t let the perfect be the enemy of the good.” I need to hear that! There are so many similar words that I read, nod my head, say yes yes yes… then I just can’t remember or keep it in perspective. I need all these sticky notes on my walls to keep this perspective in front of my face!
I’m a homeschooling mama of a 10-year old, 8-year old, almost-five-year old, and 1-year old (whose name is Gabriel, by the way). I feel things are always being disrupted! As soon as I’ve gotten the dishes washed, a load of laundry going, the poopy butt cleaned, I sit down to start school… and there’s another distraction. Arrrgh!
Thanks for keeping it real and reminding us of what really matters, even when you struggle yourself. 🙂
Missy says
Oh, I adore the cat on the mantle! Peace from the toddler? That would be the reason in my house.
Elizabeth says
I struggle with that too. And I think sometimes even more when I am anxious; it’s a good indicator of how I am doing…. God bless and encourage you!