Jonny and I made the decision not to sign up any of our kids for fall sports this year. I think it was harder for him to make the call than it was for me, but we truly needed a break. So far no one has complained, even Keats and Gabe who have been playing baseball competitively for years. Sometimes a family just needs to hunker down for a bit, and that is most definitely where we are at. It’s so wonderful not having anywhere to go in the evenings, and I am incredibly thankful for this gift of time. Every weekend we ask each other what’s on the schedule, and the amazing answer these past weeks has been, “Nothing.” Jonny and I still have plenty of work to do and that does continue into our weekends, but there’s more space right now, less running around. Saturday afternoon we made a spontaneous trip to the beach to hunt for fossils, something we used to do regularly, but in recent years quite rarely. It was an incredibly good evening without even the typical petty bickering between siblings. We were all laughing over a shared memory as we parked and Jonny and I looked at each other happily. He said, “I love this family so much.” And in that moment, all the hard work, the stress, the worry of the past year, it was like it didn’t exist. We were just a family without a care in the world, just happy to be together.
It’s easy to load the calendar with appointments and events, easier sometimes than saying, “No.” But the reward when you draw the line and say, “Enough,” is truly great.
We don’t live a storybook life, but that night it felt a little like we do.
Kate says
I am thrilled for you and your family. It is good to take time and slow down to just be a family. Glad also to read that you r health is improving. God Bless!
CathieJ says
In our neck of the woods even summer is full of activities, but we rarely signed our two children up for any of them. We just let them be kids. They did always have activities after school, but our rule was that we always ate dinner together. It is easier to do with just two that were only two years apart so usually their schedules meshed. Enjoy your afternoon and evening freedom. It is fun just being a family together.
Elizabeth says
Sounds so good!
Anne says
Beautifully written and something every family should do.
Angela says
i do agree that it is good to just breathe and say no and ease into family nothingness… it is so important and it is often forgotten about as we race around trying to get to appointments and engagements and afterschool activities. good on you and for you and your tribe. i love getting your updates in my newsfeed and love how you capture your beautiful moments in your photographs.
Helene says
Hello Ginny, still reading you after all these years, but less regulardly so doing a big catching up on this “nothing much to do Saturday lunchtime”. I love this post particularly. I was glad to see pictures of this beach and immediately thought “oh they went back there!” Just waiting for the meadow (or do you call it the prairie? I don’t know any more but you know the one I mean) now… ๐
Enjoy your beautiful family,
Helene (French lady in London)
Anne Kitching says
I think I’ll link this post on my Religious Education blog because this is SO IMPORTANT. Imagine how much worse it is for families that aren’t homeschooling! For many of them, it seems like there is nothing but running, day in and day out. I almost feel guilty asking them to show up for one more night out for Religious Education. Not so sure that a night in, and reading a Scripture verse together and discussing it wouldn’t be 100% better for them
karen says
after selling the house, it’s nice you are not running around for various sports. You get a bit of a breather ๐ I bet you’ll be running in the spring though!!
Dawn says
Best. Post. Ever. Slowing down is so difficult for modern families. Your words will inspire us all to take a look at how we, too, might slow down a bit and reconnect as families.
Jody says
Your pictures are poetic–that tiny wave coming in, the leaf on the sand–such small, beautiful bits of creation, magnified by your noticing and sharing them with us. God is the best artist, and I enjoy how you highlight his handiwork.
Tinoftea says
Free time together is just the essential part of family life to me. Kids seem to have business men schedules sometimes, so dreaming, living and non-looking clock days are just the perfect gift!
Christy says
Beautiful and fantastic photos! I’m not certain if you got a new camera, but these are stunning.
Good for you, to make a decision to have a season of calm and rest.
Richard (in Charlotte, NC) says
Well, congratulations! You have time to breathe and savor the slow moments of family life. I wish you one and all a Blessed Autumn. I can’t wait to see the photos you will inevitably show us of your Fall excursions. Tally Ho!
Barbara says
What a beautiful post, Ginny. This makes me relax and sigh, and not feel so badly for not having my kids signed up for a pile of things.
Marion says
Love the photos of Mabel and Job in the water. Love seeing photos of your family. Growing up in the city my sisters and i as well as our friends did not do any after school activities. We all survived. Spending time together as a family is most important.
Marion
Melissa Nichols says
I am so happy for you, and I totally understand. Your fossil hunting posts were some of my favorites, and actually we are planning to frequent Aurora from seeing your trips there. <3
sonrie says
This is a topic my husband and I have been talking about lately. Some extracurriculars are on the chopping block and though the word no is hard, I need to practice saying it more regularly.
Katie says
We have never had outside activities for our kids and I love it!! Plenty of work and fun right here at home! โค๏ธ
Jenn says
We don’t let our kids participate in any organized sports, they are allowed one outside of school activity each (currently girl scouts and riding lessons) . We are looked down upon because we are definitely not the norm. People just can’t believe it, they think we are not giving our kids opportunities. Those same people always ask me why my husband and I get along so great. Because we spend lots of time together as a family. I loved someone commented above about long-term opportunities…that is exactly it! I don’t care if they get a sporting scholarship and truly don’t care if they go to college. Just as long as they work hard and make a living wage.
Glad to see you were brave enough to limit activities and are truly enjoying it!
Theresa says
Beautiful. We took a week off and made the first family vacation we’d had in six years this past May. We stayed at my husband’s late grandparents’ cottage next to a lake and just let ourselves enjoy being together. It was the first time
In a long time that I felt I could just breathe. The kids still talk about it as the best place on earth. It is never ever a bad idea to let yourselves rest together. We found it quite healing and strengthening.
sharron says
One of my favorite posts ever!
Lissa says
I loved the pictures of Mabel dipping her toes in the water and the next of Jonny pulling her out sopping wet. Glad to see she isn’t the least bit afraid of the water.
I love your posts. They fill me with such a sense of peace. I know your lives aren’t perfect (who’s is?) but I am so grateful that you share these moments with us.
Heidi says
I teared up reading this heartfelt post. Also, hard to believe little Mabel is already joining the family on hunting fossils. Seems like another right of passage for another little Sheller. I love your family Ginny. Many more blessings.
Kelli Ann Wilson says
Gorgeous photo of your littlest pointing her dainty little toes as she enters the water – such beautiful composition and color! I also love Jonny’s quote about loving his family. I don’t know how it goes in your marriage, but my husband doesn’t often express his feelings like that. When he does, he means it.
sandra says
I agree – that photo is precious!
Jennifer says
I commend you for taking some time to be a family and to get off the merry go round. I wish more families would do this. I hate to see my friends so stressed about all the activities. I don’t think they’re all bad, but it’s great to see you taking a break, especially in such a busy season anyway.
Ruby says
Sign me up, please! I so want this for our family. Why is it so hard nowadays to just BE? Lovely post, Ginny, wonderful wonderful choice you’ve made for your family.
Naomi says
Yessss! I love the idea of saying no, but it’s so hard to turn down opportunities for kids. So far I’ve drawn the line that requires me to drive them anywhere (we live centrally in a small town so they can walk). But time to be together as family without rushing everywhere is so important. Glad you got to enjoy those storybook moments!
Kate says
I think we have to consider whether what we think are opportunities for kids, really are long-term opportunities. Do they take precedence over the opportunity of being a connected, peaceful family? Our priorities were eating every night together as a family, praying in the evening together (and going to Mass together on Sundays), and my husband reading aloud to the kids most evenings. Because of these goals, it wasn’t hard to say “no” to too many outside events (and our kids are talented, well-adjusted adults). I think it’s good that children learn that the common good usually takes precedence over individual desires or the “I’m the center of the universe” view of children (that some adults never grow out of). My husband was very adamant at the beginning of our parenting life that the kids wouldn’t come to treat me as their chauffeur or event coordinator. All the driving is also expensive and a strain on large-family finances as well as the environment.
Penelope says
Sounds like a great decision Ginny. Enjoy this blessed season with your family ๐
Bee says
Having time for each other is one of the best things there is. I’m happy for you! ๐ Have a good fall season ๐
Janet says
Didn’t think that little dress would stay dry for long….
Elizabeth says
that’s just so many levels of wonderful! It is really important to realize when one needs a break, that’s us this year too.
Eileen says
Ginny, this is such a beautiful post! Everyone needs a break and I believe our children benifit so much from what I use to call ‘circling the wagons’, when we would draw close to home. Living in a neighborhood with LOTS of kids and activity, I would often pull my kids in where it was only us for several days alone, immediate family only allowed and we loved it. When my children went to college they would come home when life would get to stressful or too much drama to de-stress, slow down and hear some silence, ( of course to be fed and laundered as well). Great decision! Enjoy your time together!