I sometimes forget that taking young children to the library is something that I ban from time to time like markers or glitter.
Today Larkspur asked if I could take her and Beatrix to the library at 3 o’clock to meet friends. I needed to go to the nearby post office anyway, and Gabe wanted a haircut at the barber shop round the corner, so I said sure. In a moment of fuzzy-headed-ness, I thought that this would be great. The little boys could look at books, the girls could see their friends, and I would have Mabel in the sling. No problem.
As we pulled into the parking lot, I went over the rules with Silas and Job in my best gentle, yet VERY serious, mom voice.
“Remember we don’t shout in the library. You stay with me, and NO RUNNING.”
Job piped up, “No running? …Walking?”
“That’s right Job, no running, only walking.”
“Otay!”
I believed him. (I never learn.)
We entered the library, smiling and excited. All the books. All the possibility! We marched upstairs and onto the children’s floor. It was a busy day at the library. Lots of people. Lots of children behaving well. My kids too. The girls found their friends and Silas, Job, and I (Mabel in the sling) started looking at books. It didn’t take Silas long to declare that there weren’t any good books. You know, in the whole children’s section. None. I started pulling books from the shelves and suggesting them to him, but they all “looked boring.”
I noticed Job was missing and started walking around looking for him. He was of course at the water fountain. I have a bit of a water fountain phobia. I used my sing song voice, “No, no Job! There are bad germs on that!” I am trying to train him early to avoid water fountains, though I’m pretty sure he doesn’t know what germs are yet. He gave me a grin and took a big drink before following me back to the books.
All seemed well again, though I noticed a familiar glint in Job’s eyes. Sure enough, a few minutes later he giggled and started running. I called him back, “No running, Job!” But he kept running. What a fun game! I didn’t chase him though for two reasons: I find it very difficult to run with a newborn in a sling, and I also tend to cling to my pride in public situations. I stayed calm and eventually convinced him to return to choosing books, though at this point I noticed that we had three canvas bags full. It was really time to go. But Larkspur and Beatrix wanted more time with their friends. And Gabe wasn’t back from the barber shop yet. I squatted down to dig through the bags and see what the kids had chosen to check-out while Job and Silas sat near me, looking at books. I failed to notice when Job started emptying shelves, despite the fact that I was about three feet away. I stood up and walked around a large footstool that was situated between me and the boys, and it was only then that I saw Job grabbing another book to add to one of several very large, messy stacks of books spilling all over the floor.
At this point I realized I had a small audience, which was slightly mortifying. I was a little unsure of how to proceed. I just wanted so badly to leave, but I was trapped! Naughty child, mess of books on the floor, bags of books to check out. Holding Mabel (who is beginning to fuss in the sling) with one arm while bending over, I started neatening Job’s stacks, because surely making them neater would improve things. I used my vocal power to stop Job from “choosing” anymore. Eventually I had to stop my useless stacking to grab his arm as my power was failing. A librarian who must have been alerted to the situation (mom who can’t control her children) arrived on the scene. Gesturing toward my stacks on the floor she asked, “Are these the ones you don’t want?” I apologized and she started loading them all onto a shelving cart. “I thought I could handle taking the new baby and the two year old to the library. I was wrong.” I explained. She smiled sympathetically. Thank goodness. (love her!)
I gathered up the other children and the bags of books and we headed downstairs after one last fun game of “Where’s Jobie?!”
But of course then I had to check out all those books. I won’t give you a play by play of how the little boys behaved for that. When a friend walked up and asked, “Need a hand?” I didn’t hesitate to hand her Mabel.
As the librarian checked out our books Larkspur exclaimed, “Quite a few of these won’t make it back in one piece!” Beatrix quickly chimed in with a, “Yeah!” I chose to remain silent and avoid eye contact with the librarian at that moment, though I died a little on the inside.
No markers, no glitter, no library. And I promise to pay for any damaged books.
Theresa Shingler says
Oh bless you. This could be me (though thank goodness our library has no water fountain!!) I avoid the library like the plague now, but dh and the children like going – obviously more stamina than I have, but we still have the problem of not losing the books under beds and behind cupboards and trying to keep the bigger children’s books safe from small siblings so that they go back in one piece. Between late fines and damaged books it would be easier and probably cheaper to just buy books, but it’s a good life lesson and I remind myself that one day I will have no tiny people to make life ‘interesting’
Annmarie says
Our Children were given to us to humble us….they help us become saints…
boys are physical and full of energy ….collide with the quietness of a library…
You are sweet and honest….love reading your blog….take good care lots of love Annmarie
mother of three boys and six girls…never a dull moment ….always room for spiritual growth
Annmarie says
Our Children were given to us to humble us….they help us become saints…
boys are physical and full of energy ….collide with the quietness of a library…
You are sweet and honest….love reading your blog….take good care lots of love Annmarie
mother of three boys and six girls…never a dull moment ….
Kendra Irving says
My side hurts from laughing as this has been my story for a decade, up until this year. The library is such an inviting place with many wonderful opportunities for all, especially children… the stairs that are fun to run up and down like a herd of elephants ; the buttons on elevators and computers to push; the books to stack and strew; the echo in long halls that entices squealing loudly; the drama at the self checkout…Oh the list goes on and on. And yet I still found myself at the library regularly putting us through this ordeal over and over again. One day soon you will decide to turn into the library rather than pass it by and your kids will pick books, sit quietly and read and know how to check out their books themselves. It is a gift, one we have enjoyed for the first time this summer!
Becky Barry says
Good on you taking them!
People expect babies and toddlers to be adults of convenience. Well they aren’t. I hope older folks would give toddlers a chance to learn. These boys could grow to write the books that are in the library!
Becky C says
Oh Ginny, do keep taking your children all the places you want to go. I’ve learned that my littles’ crying and misbehaving only bothers me. Other moms sympathize and even though embarrassing does it really matter in the grand scheme of things? God has given our children their exuberant personalities for His purpose and glory. Know that He has a plan and you are doing a wonderful job working alongside Him. Expose them to all the wonders of God’s world and His people. They are only little for a short time.
Becky says
Oh Ginny, do keep taking them all the places you want. I’ve learned that my crying and misbehaving littles really only bother me. Other moms do sympathize and while it can be embarrassing, does it really matter? Your children are most important and God has given them their exuberant personalities for His own design.They are only little for a short time. Keep them safe and expose them to all the wonders of God’s world and His people.
Theresa says
This is so funny. I was laughing as I read it. You described the scene so well that I could see it all in my mind. Oh boy, been there and done that. I could so relate. My problem was that often I had more books than I could carry with the baby and such. Sometimes a kind person would help me, other times I made two trips.
Sandi says
You made me laugh, mine are all grown now but it brought back memories! Hugs,
Richard (in Charlotte, NC) says
Bless your heart! My mom only raised 4 boys but I know we were a handful for sure. Tell Jonny thank you for showing off the Norwood Lumberpro – I am so envious! Was that Black Walnut he was slicing up? Not only do I cross stitch, crochet, knit and sew, I also do a little woodwork. Unfortunately, I do not have many tools for that though.
Marilyn says
Taking your children to the library will help build their appreciation for books and learning. Right now, for the youngest ones, it’s a marvelous place to play as most children’s sections are brightly colored, are decorated to appeal to them and, of course, there are other children around. And yes…they have drinking fountains, too. It’s got to be hard to resist for the youngest ones! Children’s sections are just plain fun, so don’t be too hard on yourself or them. 🙂
Does your library have story times for children? Perhaps they would enjoy that and start to associate the library with reading and stories.
I applaud you for taking your children and being actively involved.
Christine Cage says
So honest! Haven’t we all been there as Moms and Grandmoms…children keep us humble, just as God planned! I say, bless you for taking them to the library.
sonrie says
You are so brave! I laughed where you ‘died a little inside’ because that feeling is so universal, regardless of situation. Glad your librarians were understanding – that can make all the difference. I live in a city with many libraries within a short driving distance and I had to switch my main locations a few years ago because of a really grumpy librarian. Now the two librarians I see are so friendly and have my books ready when they see me coming!
TarynKaeWilson @ WoolyMossRoots says
Ginny, you have such a way with words! Though I can imagine that it wasn’t fun at the time, I love that you can share it with such a dose of humor. I always appreciate your honesty and I think so many readers can relate to your story!
Klara says
Poor Mama. I know this awful situations very well too! I avoid everything where I have to go with all the Kids, because I don’t have the power anymore. We pay a lot of money for 3 hours a Day childcare for our youngest. It allows me to complete my studies, have a rest, run to the grocery store, have a haircut, and sometimes to go to the doctor without speaking-gentle-to-my-kids-to-please-please-be-so-kind-and-be-quite-for-just-one-tiny-little-moment-please. I am at that point, where I can not anymore! Fifteen years of 24 Hour parenting is a Lot of work, most of this all on my own.
All the best for you!
Kati Green says
Thank you so much for telling your story, because that was me yesterday after a long library hiatus. It’s so helpful to know that I’m not the only mom who can’t do everything at once and that toddlers are always a handful.
Nathana Clay says
I love your honesty! And I greatly admire you. I love going to the library, but it is hard for me to keep control with my one child! She loves running fast down aisles of books, climbing, and pulling books down. To be fair, she is often quite good, but when she gets that glimmer in her eye–watch out! I also thought I would never return a late library book. Now that is a weekly occurrence for us. Fortunately our library doesn’t fine! And they have fantastic programs that we love. When we lived in Phoenix I worked in a library. Everyone could sympathize with the moms who were juggling multiple kids. Reshelving books was my job–so your kids would have kept me in business! 🙂
mamaashgrove says
Ooh what a familiar story! When my 6 year old was 2 I avoided the library with him for the next two years! And I have the same phobia of public fountains… children are drawn to them like a magnet.
Jeanette says
I foster little ones and have learnt the hard way that two year olds can only visit the library while securely strapped in their stroller. One of mine loved to push the trolleys around and would accidently push them into the furniture and other people as he could not see where he was going. Another kept going up very unsafe stairs. Another would rush behind the librarians desk and press the buttons on her phone or computer. I will never forget the time my three year old stuck her head through the bars on the upstairs mezzanine floor. It was hard to extricate her head and she screamed the place down and then she did it again the next time we went to that library! I am currently between fosters and my visits to the library are so peaceful and I have time to browse.
Leslie F says
When I saw the pictures and then started reading I thought, “She took the girls to the library while Jonny let the littles play in the mud – that is so cool!” Seems Silas and Job have adventures regardless of location. How wonderful that they are each other’s “partner in crime.” Take them to the library, to church, to wherever you want….will they be messy? Maybe. Inappropriate? Perhaps. Loud? Usually. Will they be learning? Always!
sandra says
Brings back memories!
You did well! Please know that you did well! <3
Dawn says
I request books I need for homeschooling while I am at home on my computer. I love it that I can do that at my convenience and the books will be waiting for me when I get there. Does your library do that? It really helps to reduce stress and anxiety.
I used to volunteer in a library and I am so appreciative that libraries exist. A FREE place to get books and materials for learning, such a luxury.
I have always taken my kids to the library once a week since they were babies. For me, the library was an excellent place for children to learn about respect for others, respect for others’ things (books) and how to behave in public.
In our home, we have always kept our library books on a special shelf to keep them all together so it’s easier for me to grab them up when it’s time to take them back. I don’t think my kids have EVER destroyed a book, not one that we own and most certainly not a library book. Pages have been torn by accident with a little overzealous page turning, but we have fixed it. I guess through my years of volunteering, I learned to teach my kids very young, that books are to be cherished. I’ve always unnecessarily (I think?) worried that somehow funding for a library would dry up and then libraries would no longer exist.
Laura says
Is this supposed to be encouraging? It comes off as holier-than-thou.
Angela says
Agreed!
Pam says
Seriously, who has things that together when you do all that Ginny does! Be kind!
Dana says
We try to do these things too! Everyone knows that kids will be kids, but we try our best anyway, and teach as we go. Sharing tips mom-to-mom isn’t “holier-than-thou” or unkind – it’s speaking with the voice of experience, often hard-earned experience.
Ginny – I loved your story. I have four kids and we go to the library A LOT, so your words rang true for me. Some visits I am convinced we will be escorted out and told “don’t ever come back” because one of the kids acts up in a new and unique way. But then we get to the counter and the librarians call my kids by name and laugh about their antics and talk to them about their book choices and I see that there is light at the end of the “USE YOUR LIBRARY VOICE” tunnel.
Kelly Sime says
Oh, please bring your kiddos to the library. I am a kids librarian. We love all kinds. We are used to running and messes.
Pam says
Thank you for this kind post!
sandra says
Wonderful!
Amy says
Agreed! And we’re crazy about the kids who love books.
Dana Laviano says
Oh my goodness I had a library incident with my girls when they were that age too. I was also mortified. Larkspur’s comment made me laugh out loud. Reminds me of an episode of the Simpsons when Homer is at the school library because he’s been banned from the town library. He tells Lisa, “There was some…..unpleasantness…..I can never go back.”
Have a great weekend,
Dana
@NieveandEstrellas
Emily says
Wonderful post, Ginny. Big sympathetic smile here xx
Kariann says
We took 4 of ours to a water park this week… while I was holding the door shut in the bathroom for my 6 year old, my 3 year old looked at me, smirked, and sprinted out of the bathroom across the park at full speed with me chasing after him with my 10 week old in my arms…while my 6 year old was still in the bathroom freaking out about the door not shutting..thank goodness there were nice moms in there to help me with her! I wanted to cry. I don’t think we’ll attempt the library anytime soon ha!
Julie says
Lovely post. Yes! Many times I most lovingly explain “What Mommy expects” in this or that place of business- only to have my dreams dashed by someone screaming, or having to go potty “NOW!” Even though we all used the bathroom when we came in. I love the commentary from your daughters. God bless you.
Liz says
So recognizable! And glitters, oh, I just hate them.
Jenni says
I don’t go to the library anymore as our librarians ARE judgy and it’s not nice….. after water got spilled on one book on the way one time in the pushchair and although the book was on amaaon for £4, they wanted £15 to replace it…. we haven’t been back, and that was a LONG time ago, like…. years ago….. maybe I should try again….
Dee says
Ha! Why do they love unstacking shelves so much!
Katie says
This makes me feel so much better since I also have the “no markers, no glitter and especially no library” policy!! I’ve always felt like a horrible mother for the no library policy, but the last time I braved the library was a year or so ago when my Mabel was a newborn and I quickly lost control of my other 5! The trouble with me is when things like this happen, I turn beet red, hahaha!!
Jodi says
I had the same experience with my almost 4 year old this week (and almost the exact same conversation before we went into the library). I wasn’t nearly as calm as you were by the time we got back to the car! I decided for my own sanity that we would not be returning for a few months. Thanks for sharing. It’s nice to know I’m not alone!
Megan says
Oh Ginny, I had to laugh and thank you for sharing because now I know I am not alone. We don’t do the library for the same reasons. My oldest boy use to pull all the strips of paper on a shelf of books on hold for people. I was mortified then. His younger brothers “only ” takes books off the shelves. We are now a walk in and walk out with three books each or at most, the number that equals their age, as in 3 and 6. No more browsing unless I have just one with me which is a rare occurrence. And yes too to once wanting to hand my newborn over to a stranger so I could chase my toddler down the aisles!
Emily G says
I have been taking my six ages 1-7 including 2 year old twins to the library biweekly. I try to act and feel all casual about it, but my stress level starts building when we’re trying to leave and there’s that one book that we just can’t find to return. I place holds on a bunch of stuff before we go, so I have that to fall back on if things get too crazy to choose anything. The kids snatch books “Can we buy this one? Can I buy this one?” and the baby in the Ergo snatches off shelves, too. Last time I was about to loose it, and Baby whacked me over the head with a book called “Peaceful Mama, Peaceful Baby” or something like that. I try to herd everyone out in under ten minutes before things get really bad, but last time the 5yo and 4yo were wrestling in the aisles.
You did a great job, I think.
angie says
oh ginny – i chuckled through this and i am deeply deeply sorry for that. i feel your pain… i was there with you throughout it all. you are such a brave and beautiful – awe inspiring mama and woman!
thank you for sharing ALL of it with us. its REAL and i love it.
Erin says
When our oldest were little I went to the library every day, then I had more children and insanely persevered for a while, but the day one of our children dropped a book from the top floor to the bottom was the day I declared, ‘war lost’. Thankfully they then had that wonderful invention, online reserving 🙂
years moved on and our new library opened and they are far, far more open to noise and books all on one floor. no longer worried about wiping out a borrower below. but truth is I still mostly only take the older children.
so I so relate to the mortification.
Megan Wahl says
needed a smile tonight! glad we aren’t the only ones that make a scene at the library!
Laura says
I had four kids in under four years and when they were little, I never, ever, ever, ever, took them to the library! I would leave them at home with Daddy and take orders for books. This one wants books about trains, this one wants books about electricity, that one about sheep and fairies. I would bring home heaps of books and they loved it. They didn’t even know there was another way.
Colleen says
Glitter. I am so with you! My kids don’t yet know it exists…my oldest will be turning 8. I bake with them, I ventured to the library with all 5 today (my youngest is 3 weeks old, so she was in a sling too!), we have art supplies and all sorts of fun…but glitter…nope.
Arielle says
I have also banned the library for now. It is just a stressful train wreck. We have a zillion books at home. Now, I am really mean and I have banned crayons too. What kind of mother of kids ages 7, 5, 3, and 1 bans crayons?! I just could not take the little bits of paper everywhere, the fact that they immediately broke them to pieces, and then left them all over the floor for the baby to eat. Now we use colored pencils for everything. They’re still all over the floor, but at least the baby doesn’t eat them. I keep one set of beeswax block crayons just for rubbings.
Sara says
I have 6 kids under 11. I have also banned crayons ? Colored pencils allow me to maintain my sanity!
Bree says
Not only did I love this post (amen sister-been there!), but I loved reading the comments. Such encouragement (thank you librarians for being awesome and not judging!). I know I don’t know you and I’m not sure if I’ve commented before (oh yes, it was about something, that oddly enough, freaked me and a few others out more than the snake, which I am actually ok with the snake, but I digress…) but I am sending you the biggest of hugs from one mama to another! Thank you for sharing here. Thank you for your honesty and baring your heart, fears, joys and all. It has blessed me. Happy weekend! 🙂
Ravenna says
Oh Ginny…I can’t help but chuckle at this. I can only imagine what it must be like to wrangle so many little ones. I can barely handle my one sometimes. I give you mondo kudos for being the awesome mom you are, taking your kids to see their friends and such. You are one amazing mama!
Cari Sewell says
This is why I don’t do the library with kids….my teen girls aren’t much better as we come home with way to many books that are usually way over-due by the time we remember to get them back!
Elizabeth says
I think all Mothers have this experience! Hang in there! and you survived!! and yay for GOOD librarians!!! Breathe deep and God LOVES you and your children…
Anne says
I just had *almost* the same exact experience today at the library! Such a wonderful experience! Such learning! I downed a glass of wine when I got home!
Lauren says
I’m a librarian- what you described is a typical day in the children’s room! But seriously, kids are kids and librarians know that. I personally have seen worse than what you described above. It’s all part of the learning experience for everyone!
kimberley says
I’m a (school) librarian. I just laughed my head off loud at that last comment (“quite a few of those won’t make it back in one piece”). And hey I figure that it IS part of my job to re-shelve books that children have left anywhere! They ARE being used – that is a bonus! And , actually, totally expect for there to be the odd accident with books at any house! It’s a learning curve for all. I love that you regularly visit the public library, no matter how excited your children may be. I deal with students all day long (and sometimes a teacher who has truly disappeared) and this sounds like a daily occurrence to me. I’ve very high tolerance – they are children, learning. Please do keep on going to the library (I know you must be embarrassed, but please don’t be). Perhaps that library needs to extend to playing blocks, puzzles, headphone for stories read out loud, colouring in sheets etc to give children other avenues too?
Erin says
Kimberley and Lauren
Couldn’t resist, thought as librarians you’d love to see our new town library (I mentioned in new comment)
http://sevenlittleaustralians.com/library-opening-day-finally-arrives/
it really is a fantastic library, better than any even in the City.
kimberley says
Thank you so much for showing me that Erin – I love seeing any library anywhere. What a gorgeous space! I want the picture book bins for my library. I did see the State Library of South Australia a few weeks ago – oh my!! (and bought back to NZ about 15kg worth of books for school – they are so much cheaper in Australia!!)
Erin says
Kimberley
Visited your blog and saw you’re a Kiwi 🙂
thought you’d enjoy the pics. actually I preferred their old bins, whilst not colourful they were bigger, allowed more flip room.
I get envy when I see American prices for books, they are sooo cheap. Do you know about Book Depository? Decent prices, free postage, incredible service from England.
Rachel says
Yes, yes, yes. I live in a small rural area in the UK and so many libraries are at risk of closure, partly due to lack of use. PLEASE keep going. Not only are you passing on the tradition of libraries to your kids, but they need you. Not only that, you probably made the librarian’s day. Ps. I remember the feeling and sympathise all text same x
Kendra @ A Sonoma Garden says
Oh goodness! You know I had great visions of going to the library every single week with my boys when they were little. You know, picking out a neat handful of books, going to storytime, reading out loud on their couch. But every time it was a total disaster. We’d all leave in an angry huff usually with my youngest under my arm in a football lock. We had to put a ban on the library for a few years! They are 12 & 10 now and we can finally do a peaceful morning at the library!
Rosemary Hill says
Oh goodness! Yes, I can so very much relate to this story… Our old libraries had awkwardly-placed children’s sections, every one of them. So I would try to take the kids and the toddler twins would RUN down separate aisles, throwing foreign-language books and cookbooks (or whatever nonfiction sections they had chosen that day) to the floor while I waddled after them in pregnant misery. That was when I realized that hey, maybe we’re better off just putting books on hold and having my husband pick them up on his way home from work…
And I’m STILL annoyed that they destroyed a copy of a novelization of Disney’s Frozen. I had to pay to replace THAT trash? Now books like that stay at the library “for other kids to read” and, for the most part, I don’t feel like paying to replace any of the books we check out would make me feel like we’re providing other readers with subpar material :/
Angela says
That “trash” may have encouraged a child to read that otherwise would have had no interest. It is not our job to criticize what children choose to read, only to do our best to get them to do so. And yes, as a parent we are responsible for what our children destroy and must set a good example by rectifying the situation.
Becky says
I love you Ginny! You make me feel better for all the scenes that have unfolded with my children in public….it is good to know that We have all been there!
Sheliah says
And amen!