This morning, Gabe and I were going through one of our beehives when Seth shouted from the top of the hill that Em Em was dead.  We’d been looking for her all morning.  As much as we’ve tried to keep her indoors, she wanted to be outside sometimes, and with all the comings and goings of everyone, she’s been slipping out regularly.  This morning we were worried when we couldn’t find her, but assumed she was in her new favorite hang out under the house.  In fact, she’d been struck by a car.

I stood there in my gloves and jacket surrounded by an angry group of bees (queenless colony) almost frozen in place.  My mind did that thing, that it’s not possible thing.  But then I heard the wails start as the girls heard the news and I started quickly putting supers back in place.  I hurried up the hill fumbling with the zipper on my jacket, finally getting it over my head.  Silas was at the top crying.  When I picked him up, he mentioned that he had fallen down.  He wasn’t actually crying over Em.  At this point I began to sob myself.  I set Silas down only to pick up Beatrix.  I held her in my lap on the porch and cried.  I wanted to be strong and brave, but I couldn’t.  Jonny was already digging a hole, I guess just wanting to quickly get Em taken care of.  Through tears, Larkspur was gathering flowers to place on the grave.  Everything happened so quickly.  It was only last summer that Keats spotted her as a tiny kitten in the Costco parking lot.  He’s always considered her to be his cat.  He was the one to carefully hold her in his lap in the van after I pulled her from the bushes.  His bed was often her first choice at the end of the day.  It’s almost harder to watch an older child fight tears than it is to watch a younger child cry openly.

We took the kids for ice cream, and then I had a night out with friends which helped.  I’ll confess that I had both a hot fudge sundae and a salted caramel milkshake in one day.

Anyway, this is the last thing that I wanted to be writing about tonight, but I figure it’s best to get it over with.  Em is in so many of my pictures.  She was such a curious, intelligent little cat, always right in the middle of things.  It’s difficult to lose a pet, at least it always has been for me.  Even more so is to watch your children grieve the loss.  Em will be missed.  She can’t be replaced.

(Hardest time picking photos to go with the post…old one of Em curled up next to me while I knitted.  Recent one of weeds and not even pretty ones–totally unrelated-oh well.)


  1. I’m very sorry, I hope you all are recovering somehow.
    We haven’t been able to have a pet, I would love to, but we live in the city in a tiny apartment, I don’t think that a pet would be happy in such space.

  2. I’m so sorry! It’s so hard losing a pet. Poor Keats — and everyone else.

  3. xoxo

  4. I’m late in reading your post but I want to tell your family how sorry I am that your sweet kitty was killed by a car. It’s so deeply painful to lose a beloved animal who was such a source of love and tenderness. I hope that Keats can focus on the great compassion he showed in finding her and loving her; and that your whole family finds comfort in the love your share for each other.

    I know every time I lose a pet I think – no more! Only to be drawn back to the wonders of the animal-human bond and how much I learn from my pets’ love for me and mine for them.

  5. so sorry for your loss <3

  6. Monique says:

    Dear Ginny,
    So sorry to read your sad news. Strength and hugs to all of you! And try to remember what a wonderful life you gave her for the past year!

  7. I am so sorry for your loss and the grief your family is experiencing. Em Em brought so much joy to all of you and all of us. Thats truly a great gift. Blessings to you all and may she chase many butterflies in heaven!

  8. I am so sorry this happened. I know, our pets are like family.

  9. I’m soo sorry, it’s so hard to loose a pet.

  10. I am so sorry for your loss! I love cats…I’m certain yours will be loved and missed…

  11. Beth T. says:

    So, so sorry to read this. My heart goes out to each of you. She was dearly loved, which is a gift in this big old world.

  12. Lou Anne says:

    I am so sorry for your loss of EmEm. I have always loved your pictures of this kitty. She was truly a beauty. She was a lucky girl to be with your family and loved.

  13. chtisty says:

    I remember the post on April 24th. Through larkspur eyes- had some grseat pictures of em em. Remember? O

  14. So sorry. That’s such a hard thing to go through. All the best to you and your family.

  15. Sandra Davidson says:

    So sorry about loss of sweet Em it it so hard to lose a well loved pet I know this because we have gone through this many times and it is never easy. Blessings to you and family.

  16. So sorry for your family’s loss.

  17. I am so sorry for your loss.

  18. So sorry for your loss Ginny and Family! I hate losing pets!

  19. Sheliah says:

    Ginny, Wishing sweet memories of EmEm. Losing a pet is so difficult. Hugs to you and your family.

  20. Sandra says:

    Sorry, didn’t mean to post twice.

  21. Sandra says:

    Ginny – I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I adore cats and I know how much you all will miss Em-Em. You’re in my prayers as will the person driving the car. If he or she was a cat lover, there will be equal, if not greater, devastation.

  22. Sandra says:

    Ginny – I am so sorry to hear of your loss. I adore cats and I know how much you all will miss Em-Em. You’re in my prayers.

  23. Nancy M says:

    Oh this is too close to home. We saved a kitten in 2007 and at the time we lived on 3 acres and she would go in and out. Now we live in a neighborhood and we have a screened in porch and she likes to go there but lately she’s been slipping out and hiding under the porch. I’m going to have to keep a better eye on her. I’m so sorry. That’s heartbreaking!

  24. Ginny,
    Sorry to hear about Em Em. That’s always hard.

    Love to you all,

  25. I’m so so sorry. Sending gentle thoughts to all of you.

  26. Oh Ginny! I am so SO SORRY! I’ve lost too many cats to cars *sigh* All one can do is pray. She’s resting now in the care of angels. HUGS to you and your sweet family <3

  27. I’m crying too. I’m so sorry for your loss.

  28. Oh no! I loved seeing her in pics. A cat in the house is just so sweet. I am so very sorry. I would have cried myself silly. It’s ok.

    My inside cat likes to go outside also but since she is gray and we live on a very busy street or two I won’t let her roam free and I am always keeping an eye on her like a baby. She is a very scaredy cat so I don’t have to worry too much about her escaping. Although once she did while we were putting down a new kitchen floor. She ran out to the corner in the dark! It took forever to catch her. I was crying and mad at my husband for leaving the door open. I let her sit in the backyard attached to a tie-out and sometimes I will walk her around on it in the backyard. She especially likes it in the evening and I have to leave the door open which I don’t like but I want her to be happy. Sorry to ramble.

  29. Em Em looks like my cat Freya.

    Massive hugs from northern California to you and your family.

  30. Angela says:

    Oh, so sorry. I have been through this twice with dearly loved little friends. Really truly heartbreaking. Haven’t had to do this since kids though. Best wishes. A

  31. Shelly says:

    Huge hugs!! We’ve had that happen to a few when we lived in the country and it is always just absolutely and completely heartbreaking. Just reading this brought back the memories of all the cats that have passed through our lives and every single one of them is missed so much! And, yes, I never, ever know how to help my son through it or what to do for him. Only 2 kinds of ice cream for a day like that is showing great restraint, in my opinion.

  32. Ashley says:

    So sorry for your loss. A pet is such a joy and their loss always leaves such a hole in the family. Wish that you all remember the special times you had with her.

  33. Andrea says:

    I feel with your family. Mine lost two cats to accidents with a car and anyway, no matter how it happens, it is always so hard to let a pet go…I´ll have your family in my prayers tonight.

  34. Oh I am so, so sorry….sitting at my desk at work with a tear in my eye.
    It’s always so hard to lose a beloved pet.

  35. Charlotte says:

    Oh Ginny this is so sad, im so sorry. I wish you all well.

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