Amidst: baby preparations, sewing projects, spring in the garden, dirty hands, major home renovation projects, and the little things like trying to remember to drink enough water, I am trying to maintain a sense of quiet. Obviously impossible for my ears, but I am working on my mind.
I wonder, could I just spend this next month with a sense of calm, rather than the urgent need to “get ready” that usually precedes a new baby? Can he just come and join us, without all the fuss (on my part?) Can I have a new baby without repainting the kitchen first? Can I anticipate his birth without fear?
There is something different this time, but I can’t put my finger on it. I vacillate between calm and overload. But, the calm is winning out I do believe.
Yesterday, I was doing the boys’ laundry (something I typically don’t do anymore as it is now their own responsibility) in the process of switching their wardrobes for warm weather, and I felt this overwhelming sense of the privilege of taking care of my children. You’d think it an exclusive right, but it isn’t. I don’t have to worry about things such as where the next meal I feed my children will come from.
Those things that do worry me, they are actually signs of the blessings upon us.
And, if all of my children seem to have morphed into wild horses over the past couple of weeks, then we are alive and we are together and surely a wonderful change is on the horizon: new life.
p.s. Today begins Holy Week. It will be quiet here. We will have Yarn Along on Wednesday though.
p.p.s. Those green booties were a gift from Julia, here’s a link to the pattern.
Leave a Reply